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Post by Hazel on Jan 27, 2009 19:23:04 GMT -5
DRAGONHEART
could you kill me
if the world was on fire
and nothing was left
but hope or desire
A sure-footed paw placed its hold upon the soft ground of the marsh and slid slightly to the side in the wet ground. It hardly set the bulky tom off balance, though. Very little did, terrain-wise. But when it came to social skills, that was when Dragonheart faltered. It had been long ago, and far from Shadeclan, but it was his only kithood memories. They held him back from all that life could be, and as his tail twitched, a sharp stab of pain filled it in memory of the chunk missing from his appendage used for balance. Just another reminder of the pain.
His claws reached out, sinking into the soggy ground with a silent, seething anger. An anger that no one would ever know the cause of. Not that they cared enough. If they did, they wouldn't have been chased away by his fits. Even he knew that. He wasn't stupid, just challenged at connecting with others. He didn't know why it was so easy for all of them to just be happy, make friends, talk about whatever they wanted to. He just knew it would never be that easy for him, and that they had to live with it, whether they wanted to or not.
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Post by Infinity on Jan 27, 2009 21:08:41 GMT -5
The large tom was abnormally silent as he scraped dry earth over his recent kill, a limp frog killed only moments ago. He planned on catching a few more meals before heading back to camp, and continued his hunt, paws damp and cold from the marsh.
As he slunk through ShadeClan's territory, his mind wandered to his new apprentice. He knew he ought to teach her more hunting skills for the prey in their territory, since she needed to know some way to provide for the Clan. His whiskers twitched, and he prayed to StarClan that she wouldn't be hopeless as some other loners he had encountered before, who ended up eating crowfood or twoleg garbage because of their incapabilities.
Soon a familiar ShadeClan scent passed him, and he glimpsed a tabby pelt. With a moment's hesitation, he padded over toward Dragonheart, his yellow eyes devoid of emotion, lacking the narrowed, almost frusterated expression he usually wore. He waved his tail in greeting.
"Hello, Dragonheart. How come you're out here alone?" He asked, wondering for a moment if the warrior would rather be left alone. He pushed the thought away. If the tom wanted him to shut his mouth and hunt by himself, Nighstorm would be able to tell.
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Post by Hazel on Jan 27, 2009 21:30:53 GMT -5
DRAGONHEART
then grace takes me to a place
of the father you never had
ripping and breaking and tearing apart
this is not heaven, this is my hell
Dragonheart, lost in his thoughts, tensed a moment, almost about to growl when he recognized the voice as that of the deputy. Though he didn't exactly relax, he certainly wasn't on the edge of attacking anymore. He looked up from his paws, where he'd been staring, and caught equally emotionless eyes gazing back.
I'm alone even in a crowd, Nightstorm. I'm just more sane when I'm entirely alone.
If his deputy had known his thoughts, he would have caught the bluff. His second sentence was far from true. So, so far. In truth, it was when he was alone like he had been that he thought about all the things that could kill him, that almost had killed him before, and he broke down. It never showed outwardly, not even a single tear, but inside was what counted, and that's what was falling apart.
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Post by Infinity on Jan 27, 2009 22:10:12 GMT -5
An eyebrow raised at the warrior's jumpy reaction. He slowed himself to walk at the same pace as Dragonheart, yellow eyes staring ahead as he listened to the warrior's answer. He resisted another eyebrow lift, and merely kept himself focused on walking.
"Unusual. Seems like most cats are tortured by themselves, inside." As if I would know, he added to himself sarcastically. But it was so easy to read the others, as if the words running through their mind were shown in their eyes, through their voice, and that's how he knew how bad someone could be hurting, how deep their invisible wounds could be hiding. He brought his scurrying thoughts to a silence, listening to their soggy pawsteps through the marsh.
"Is there anything bothering you?" he asked, glancing at the tabby tom. He didn't mean to pry, but if there was something wrong going on in the Clan, he should find out. He was deputy, he needed to look out for his Clan.
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Post by Hazel on Feb 11, 2009 17:06:33 GMT -5
DRAGONHEART
could you kill me
if the world was on fire
and nothing was left
but hope or desire
He cast a sly, uncertain glance over at the darker colored cat out of the corner of his eye. An attempted assessment of how much he really cared, or if he was just wondering if what was, clearly, bothering the younger tom affected the clan, or just his tormented self. He wasn't as good at reading cats as he wished though, and found nothing in his futile efforts. His gaze returned ahead, as he sneered slightly at his memories.
Oh, there's always been something bothering me. Doesn't have to do with the clan, though, so it's hardly important. Just a haunting, a constant nightmare. S'always been there. Learnt to live with it long ago.
Live with it, certainly. Cope with it well? Not so much. But that was told in multitudes by his not as obviously self pity, by his clanmates that steered well away from him if they had that option. No question would be required to know how much it really bothered him, whatever it was.
[/size] -I entirely forgot about this post, sorry!-[/color][/font] |
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Post by Infinity on Feb 15, 2009 14:02:55 GMT -5
[ooc; no problem (: ]
Although he wanted to know more, he knew better than to pry. Most cats prefered to keep things to themselves, and it was up to them whether or not to share. As long as it wasn't going to affect his Clan, he was okay.
"It's important if it's always there," he murmured, then added, "Is there any way that you could be rid of this?"
Oops, he had told himself to drop it, but seems like he wasn't listening. Not asking if the cat wanted his help, merely wondering if this was something unescapable, something that he would have to live with for the rest of his life, or even as he dwelled in StarClan.
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